What Happened???

I am a lot of things. I am spouse, a parent, a pet keeper, a friend, a student, a gardener, a gamer, a streamer, a cook, a wanderer, a creative, a writer, a change addict, a neurodivergent person, a big person, a coffee drinker, a teetotaler, a mystic, a neighbor, a driver, a worker, a thinker, a sugar addict, a diplomat, a Washingtonian, a US citizen, an overachiever, a maximalist, a fierce competitor - this is not a complete list. It never is, like everyone I am so many things and life is always in flux.

Small Person Times

I am from Northeastern Washington state. It is a wild place with endless forests, pristine lakes, and spectacular nature. It's geologically the oldest part of Washington and includes parts of the ancient North American craton. There are Precambrian metasedimentary rocks that are over a billion years old there. (More: Washington's Ancient Core). All that to say it is a unique place and I had the great fortune to grow up there, playing in the forest. I also have a best friend from childhood. We've been besties for over 30 years. She's a main character in my tale, for sure.

Like many people from small towns, I couldn't wait to leave. At 17 I moved out and went to college. I promptly flunked out of the first year (more on that another time), moved to Seattle and started community college where I found my footing. Then I went on to the University of Washington and graduated in 2004.

Early Adult Times

The first thing I did after graduation was get married. I am still married (to the same person) over 20 years later. It's a weird thing - when I am talking to city people they are appalled that people get married so young (I was 22) in the country. Country people were surprised I waited so long - practically an unmarriable spinster at 22. I live in both of these worlds, which can be tricky.

Work-wise, I bounced around for a couple of years with a totally unclear focus. I wanted to go to law school. I would be an archaeologist. Maybe I needed an MBA? Meanwhile I worked as a temp and played a lot of video games.

Then one day I stumbled onto a company that I really liked through the temp agency and they hired me. They taught me accounting and human resources work. This was a fantastic incubator and gave me the foundational skills and confidence to launch into the career that would come to define my entire life: The Foreign Service.

The FSO Life

In September 2009 I entered the U.S. Foreign Service as part of the 148th A-100 class. I reported to Washington, DC and began a journey that altered me in every way. This was more than a career - it permeated every single aspect of my entire life. I served four tours abroad, two in DC, and one remotely from WA. It was an incredibly rewarding, terrifying, all-encompassing, dizzying, intense, challenging and incredible experience. In 2013 I earned tenure in the Foreign Service and was confirmed as a career diplomat in April 2014. I served with distinction until 2025 when it became untenable for me to remain any longer. I finally fully separated from the service in September 2025.

Being an FSO defined me in so many ways. It dictated where in the world I lived and what house was mine. It bound me to strict ethics and conduct rules that loomed over me every minute of my life. Most everyone I knew was a diplomat. We talked about diplomat stuff. We had a culture and language that was completely unknowable to anyone on the outside. It gave me the stability to become a parent and a first time homeowner, and so much anxiety and fear the I stopped sleeping somewhere around 2011. In many ways it was perfect for me and in many other ways I was not built for it. Brene Brown calls it the "tenacity of paradox." While I did grow into a formidable and strong person through the experience, in the end I parted from the diplomatic corps with deep relief.

Now Times

So now I am starting over. I live in Southeastern Washington now, in the steppe lands that were carved by the glacial lake Missoula ice-age floods and the Columbia River Flood Basalts. Back in the 509 area code, I feel at home again. The nature of my home state speaks to me, and I am thrilled to hear its voice again. I am also thrilled with the 300 days of sunshine.

In the in-between when the separation from my identity as a diplomat was raw, I needed to process and figure out my way forward sort of quietly. I experimented with things I never would have done as an FSO (see you Friday morning on my Twitch live stream, right?). I have learned truths about the nature of my brain wiring that have changed my entire perspective. I have a new professional life, a garden, a house with a garage, a dog, a cat...it all feels so weird, but it is all mine and I can't wait to wade through it all with you.

Identity shift in your 40s is rough. It is unsettling. But it is also so incredibly liberating. I can't wait to bring you along while I navigate this and maybe I can help you find your way too.